I knew something was bothering me, but it felt distant & intangible. A vague discomfort of sort..
Then the malaise became more acute. I knew my self-destructive thoughts – where my self-esteem suffered the most. Yet, I was knee-deep in this yuck, unable to break free from the downward pull of despair.
Finally, after having spent several days in an intimate embrace with my demons, finally, I knew them. Their lies, their falsehood, their weaknesses. I was nor am not them. Poor shadows unable to feel love, they sought my attention. And confused, I gave it to them. Unaware, I fed them. I tied myself to them. So closely in fact that I discovered their essence: not love, thus false, unreal. An illusion.
Ah, the relief – I'd found the key out of this hell! This was my first clue on how to heal this part of myself. My soul is pure & perfect. My experience living takes me on an adventure like no other, always rediscovering my true nature. Thus the healing began & the synchronicity confirmed. The first step is taken (recognizing the problem), half of the work is done. Now that the destructive aspect of wholeness is complete, I am joyfully beginning the creative counterpart. Some of it I feel is working behind the scenes, in my subconscious, and some of it I am actively bringing about.
I am feeling light, elated, released! I will make sure to go all the way so that no fragment is left behind.