I was out of breath lately, out of faith. My dream seemed too big for plain ol' me. The fear monkey was running wild in my head: "You're running out of time!" he said, "You should have made a safer choice with a smaller project."
Yeah right! *snort*
I was tired of being anxious, irritable & worried. Most of these fears weren't even mine! (I don't know whose they are, I just don't believe them when I stop & think about it. Note to myself: think more often about it!)
It bears repeating: this isn't my dream project, it's the Universe's. I never would have taken on such a crazy idea! Ha! I would have been a nice ecologist, somewhere in an office. Clearly, that wasn't the best of choice & I started having all these "ideas" of freedom, wild abundance, & irresistible laughter. I had little experience of that, so I could hardly have made that up. I'm intelligent + creative, but I'm also confined within my experience.
Now, despite the fatigue & the challenges, I'm on it! I'm giving it my all because I want to know how it feels to leave nothing on the table. Spend it all (figuratively & yes, financially)!
I'm going to jump down the cliff everyday until the Universe catches me. It's a dare & I'm not quitting. What fun would that be?! Boooring!
So, there you have it, defiant + rebel as can be (for me).
I'll do whatever it takes, I'll grow & learn & rest – until it's done :) 'Cause then, I'll want to do it again ;)